being a perfect woman not only having to be a good entertainer -to relax your husband , being sociable ,keeping good relationships with his friends and family members ,
, providing good service in bed , keeping the house tidy
but also having to prove her capability and intelligence by investing her time wisely - doing something meaningful - by taking a full time job , serious job ... perhaps making a lot of money would be the best ....
that would be a perfect woman that every man would be so proud of ...
and that is also a perfect man for us too ...
the truth is .. there isn't a 100% perfect man or woman
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" find a person who loves you for exactly what you are.
Good mood, bad mood, ugly, pretty, handsome, what-have-you.
The right person is still going to think the sun shines out of your ass.
That's the kind of person that's worth sticking with "
what I learnt from my 6-year relationship with my ex-boyfriend ,Richard is - it's extreamely crucial to accept and love for what we are ..and to be honest and open with each other .
I never loved or accepted him for what he really was ,and neither did he .
from the very beginning of the relationship , he was already a man with many flaws in my eyes .
He was so critical ,sarcastic , judgemental , paranoid ,and seemed to be always full of himself , all I heard from him was criticism , criticism and criticism ... so I tried to "tolerate " his "differences " but often ended up arguing .
I didn't like his body figure either - he had too narrow , sloped shoulders ...too long arms and later he grew a big belly ,and his face was too long and I thought his sideburns looked stupid ..he was not a good looking guy for me .
this is another prove that when you don't love someone ...everything about him is wrong ..even the stupid things such as how he looks ...
(okay, I admit that I was behaving very shallow .. I like to have a good looking boyfriend ? )
in another word - I never loved him the way I thought I did ,therfore he was never perfect for me .
I was not happy ,and I was not being 100% myself the whole time when I was with him , I tried to be the person he wanted me to be .. but I couldn't and I would never be .
when I started seeing all those " imperfections " in him , the relationship was meant to be doomed .
how can you expect a relationship to work when all you can see is the flaws ...
I was young , I was inexperienced and selfish ... I didn't know what love really is or how I should feel when I am in love .... all I could feel was unhappiness and uncertainties .
I couldn't really realise what was happening to our relationship early enough , otherwise we would have been able to ended it sooner ... before we hurt each other so badly .
I sincerly hope that he will find someone he loves and who really loves him for who he is .
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"once bitten , twice shy "
I certainly do not want to make the same mistakes again ...to waste my time and energy on someone who I don't love and who can't accept me for what I am ....
don't ever think you can change someone ... no matter how much they love you ...
the only person who you can make a change in is yourself ...
I'm learning to see the world from different angles through my viewfinder (camera) , I focus on and appreciate what is beautiful in everyone I have encountered , everything I have seen , everywhere I have been to ....
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I have found someone who is absolutely " perfect " for me ...
I love him for what he is ,and I never have to " accept " his " flaws " or " weakness "
- because they are never the flaws to me ..
they are what make him so special , they are what make him who he is now, they are his " traits "
The right person is still going to think the sun shines out of your ass.
That's the kind of person that's worth sticking with
no wonder that people say " love is blind " :)
when you are in love ... the sun is shining , the birds are singing , the world is beautiful !
the person standing in front of you is the most perfect person you can ever imagine ...
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we often assume what is best for someone ... what is the right thing to do ... what is the smartest thing to do .... but we often forget whether it is the thing that they really want to do or whether it would make them happy ...
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I don't want to be judged whether I am perfect or not ...
I don't want to be the best ,
I don't want to be the worst ,
I don;t want to be perfect ,
I just want to be happy ,
be relaxed ,
be allowed to be in good mood or bad ,
want to make everyone around me happy ...
I
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